I would like to express my gratitude towards everyone who has come through showing their love and support. By all means, you have all moved me. Most importantly I am grateful for all the compassion you have showed my sister Sondos and my family, thank you. The messages were overwhelming as they came pouring in, I always thought I was just another human, yet seeing the impact which I have made on each and every one of you throughout my life, it made me feel like someone unique. I feel cherished and that is all thanks to you. I love you all dearly, ameen to all your prayers. You are all in mine.
My update, Good News!
Now being that we did not have breast cancer in the family, the nurse working on my case went on and did other testings a few weeks ago which I have received the results this past Wednesday, the blood work I tested for was a really large gene called the "BRCA" which is;
"(breast cancer 1, early onset) is a human tumor suppressor gene, which produces a protein, called breast cancer type 1 susceptibility protein. It is found in the cells of breast and other tissue, where it helps repair damaged DNA, and destroy the cell when DNA can't be repaired. If BRCA1 itself is damaged, the damaged DNA can let the cell duplicate without control, and turn into a cancer."
luckily my results came out negative, which means I do not have it and my genes and they are not mutating, yet this is leaving my doctor and nurse baffled as to why I have breast cancer..???! for now this is all still a mystery. Throwing out there reasons why it could be, things such as something I was exposed to at some point, the food I have been eating, now mind you these last five years they assume is when it started forming inside my body and in these past five years; I have not been paying attention to my diet, eating less with a drastic weight loss, over worked and barely rested, stressing myself, anxieties, over thinking, feeling down, you name it, all that is harmful to my body and health which they tell you not to do because it may cause illnesses such as cancer, I have done! I am too young to be having breast cancer yet here I am. Its funny actually, at my appointments when I was going in to get diagnosed and as I attend all my other appointments, I would be sitting in waiting areas with women who roughly looked 40-50+ which definitely tells you something about my situation, what am I doing here and why?
Being that I have tested negative on the BRCA and my other blood work, MRI, PET scan came out clean, no cancer spread through my body, (al hamdullah) I am now a candidate for a "lumpectomy" which is to surgically remove the tumor and any tissues around it in my breast, had it come out positive then I would have opted to doing a "mastectomy" which is surgically removing the whole breast and maybe the second to stay on the safe side that it wouldn't mutate, coming back on the other side. My age being so young would have put me in a risk due to my hormones being all over the place, it would have caused the damaged cells to mutate quicker! my surgical date is yet to be scheduled.
These past few months I have been re-evaluating my life, I have really sat back and looked at the bigger picture, we are running after this life for survival yet we forget, slowing down is the key to staying alive. Our bodies are not machines, they are bound to break down when overly or improperly used. There is so much one can handle that you need to remind yourselves we are not supermen/ and or superwomen. One needs to remember that life is about taking it day by day, here I am work free, stress free this illness oddly enough has made me feel alive again, enjoying each and every moment I am given, blessed to see another day. It turns out here I was running around trying to make a living for myself, that I wasn't really "Living". I know this may sound cliche, but slow down and smell the flowers, they actually have a scent! There are things we tend to forget when we are so caught up with "survival mode", working is good, yes to make ends meet, but do remember to take a break, appreciate your life, your family and loved ones. Everything will happen when the time is right, no need to stress in the moment, leave it to the future to unravel itself.
If you need to contact me, please do at psychology.817@gmail.com
I wish for you to live a beautiful life x
hello, its me hadeel :) I cannot believe what an amazing woman you have become, even more amazing than the girl I remember. Since I first learned about what happened with you from Sondos, I have been following your blog in awe. I could not believe it at first and I was speechless. I felt like nothing I could say could possibly express what I am feeling. mashallah 3aleiky the way you are dealing with this is so healthy and brave I am so proud of you. You are an inspiration to me and so many people whom you do not even know. My aunt is in her 30s and was diagnosed with non-hodgkins lymphoma. I told her about you and she was so very touched when reading your blog and says she wishes she could be more like you. Thank you for touching the lives of so many people.
ReplyDeleteLike you say, people are not really "living", they dont think about their bodies and what they put in them. What your writing is also a wake up call for so many women out there.
And even though it makes things more confusing, it is amazing news that you do not have any BRCA mutations, because you may know those are terrible and are also associated with other types of cancer as well, like ovarian cancer. il 7amdillah for that. inshallah the operation you will undergo will be a permanent cure ya rab. allah yeshfeeky o yw2awmek bl salameh. me and so many people are praying for you. keep us inspired and updated with everything that happens with you.
Love always,
Hadeel Masoudi
Not sure how this works, I replied a while back but didn't realize it didn't post so here it goes x
DeleteHey Hadeel,
How are you habibty? It is a actually a great pleasure to hear from you after all these years, I'm actually always asking about you through Sondos, walo you've always been like Sondos to me, a sister. First and foremost I heard about you getting married, habibty alf mabrook I hope you live a happy, healthy, and prospers life together. I hope Marriage life is treating you well?
now as for my situation, you are too sweet always have been. I know its tough as many do feel the need to want to help me, but you writing me this comment, telling me these words. They meant the world to me, they truly touched me making me feel like I have accomplished what I started this blog for. I am sadden to hear about your aunt, she's simply too young for this. May allah yeshfeha ya rab. Tell her to be strong to remember there is no obstacle too bug for her, allah always gives us what we can handle. Tell her the key to fighting this illness us to be strong minded and strong bodied, eat well and think well. She doesn't have to start with something as big as a blog, she can do something small as to try to help those around her. Inshallah she will be fine, she'll definitely be in my prayers x
I hope I do bring awareness to anyone and everyone through my blog because breast cancer we women tend to brush off thinking "its just a lump" Yes al hamduallah every day it wasn't a mutation, Thank you for your support and kind words.
I love you always habibty, stay well and keep in touch xx